In real life I try to watch the language I use in speech. I avoid cuss words. I avoid negativity. I avoid offending others. No matter what I do, I have found others will always interpret things differently than how I mean. So, people are offended, hurt and disgusted by my words.
In my writing, I find I do the same thing. My characters don't say shit, or damn, or the f-word. But, that isn't realistic. In revisions, I cringe when I nudge myself. Knowledge hits me that that kind of word belongs in that spot. I want to fight and argue with myself. Why do they have to say that? There are a million other ways a character can express themselves. Why do I have to give in?
It's not giving in. I'm not doing it. The character in my book is doing it. It makes them realistic. The readers expect it. I don't write Disney. I write adult fiction.
Sure, a reader, somewhere along the line may think what my Mom always said. "Why do they have to do all that cussing on TV?" I agree, I don't like it either. But when I walk down the street, or go into the store, or anywhere there are people, there is cussing. It's what people do.
Am I the only one that struggles with this?
In my writing, I find I do the same thing. My characters don't say shit, or damn, or the f-word. But, that isn't realistic. In revisions, I cringe when I nudge myself. Knowledge hits me that that kind of word belongs in that spot. I want to fight and argue with myself. Why do they have to say that? There are a million other ways a character can express themselves. Why do I have to give in?
It's not giving in. I'm not doing it. The character in my book is doing it. It makes them realistic. The readers expect it. I don't write Disney. I write adult fiction.
Sure, a reader, somewhere along the line may think what my Mom always said. "Why do they have to do all that cussing on TV?" I agree, I don't like it either. But when I walk down the street, or go into the store, or anywhere there are people, there is cussing. It's what people do.
Am I the only one that struggles with this?
Nope, it's not just you. I've had members of my critique group almost gang up on me demanding a stronger word before. I now find myself acting more like a medium and just typing what the characters are saying rather than trying to censor them.
ReplyDeleteYes, my mantra has turned into 'React realistically' which means with the obscene words too.
ReplyDeleteI agree with you Faith. I struggle with it too. It's almost like, if I write the 'naughty cuss words' the reader will judge me and think what a horrible woman! Which is untrue, because like you said, it's not us using the word, its the character.
ReplyDeleteI think it's similar to the whole sex scene thing....at first I found this really difficult to write. I thought people may think I was basing it on my thoughts and antics! But thats not true....same for the swear words, just because we write them doesnt mean we like them. I think your blog post could apply to anything we feel a little out of the comfort zone of writing or using. If that makes sense?
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It sure does. It never pops into my head that I'm not writing an autobiography, but when I get to the sex and 4 letter words, why do I worry that the reader will think of me and my actions.
ReplyDeleteStrange how the brain works.